Skip to main content

Rump shakin' good times...

You know those kind of posts where Mommy's put up the adorably insightful quotes of their brilliant and beautiful children? This isn't really one of those.

Here are my two quotes of the week:

8 year old daughter, "Mommy? A boy on the bus called me a funny name today and I looked it up in the dictionary but it wasn't there. What does 'Biotch' mean?"

6 year old daughter, "Mommy? Why do some of the ladies in your music call their booty a 'Money Maker'?"

So now I have a compulsion to get on the bus this afternoon and kick the ass of an 8 year old boy who probably doesn't know what a biotch is either. But trust me, he will when I get done with him.

As for the money maker question, I just changed the subject because I didn't know how to answer her. I am sure, however, that the subject will return. Any suggestions on how to answer that without using the following industry buzz words?
  • shake what cha momma gave ya
  • working the pole
  • Pimps up, ho's down
  • shake dat ass
  • bitch, gimme my money!
  • sex industry
Someone? Anyone??? While I'm waiting for your brilliant and helpful responses I'll send a feed to Humor-Blogs.com to see if they can add some insight.
Labels:

Comments

Bee said…
Maybe you can say:
"The say this because they're proud of their butt."
I dunno, I'd be freaking out and changing the subject too! I don't have kids but my niece is 4 and is at the age of 1 milion and One questions.
1:12 PM
Anonymous said…
how about, "cos if at some point it gets big enough, they can become a spokesperson for jenny craig."
1:33 PM
Anonymous said…
haha I like Leigh's answer! you could also maybe tell her it's because they get paid to dance in the music videos? it's slightly closer to the truth... lol
2:30 PM
Reed said…
Oh crap. This sounds like a conversation we had yesterday about the meaning of "ghetto". Then when we stopped to get gas, my son pointed to a bystander who happened to be Afro American and very loudly said "Hey Mom, is that what you mean by ghetto?" I sure wish the window hadn't been down. Damn this warm weather!!
Tell her that money maker is just a silly term like "booty." Then suggest some ice cream or something to divert her attention. Then switch to the easy listening station. Hopefully they don't play 50 cent.
6:46 PM
elasticwaistbandlady said…
My oldest got off the bus one day after Kindergarten and started singing that Nelly song, "It's Getting Hot In Here, So Take Off All Your CLothes."

I told her she heard the lyrics wrong from the bus heathens and that it actually went "It's getting cold in here, so put on all your clothes."

I love 5 year olds. You can still deceive them to some extent.
7:43 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Florida: The Good. The Bad. The Holy SHIT!!!

So you know...I live in Florida now. The good news is that my southern accent is stronger than ever - I think it was some sort of defense mechanism...of or for what, I have no idea. I definitely miss Atlanta and my friends, though, especially now. Spring in Atlanta is SO beautiful. But Florida is pretty nice, too. We go to the beach at least once a week and we all love having a pool in the backyard. Also, my husband makes me a Planter's Punch every night and I don't even feel guilty by knocking it back - we're on vacation, right?? A couple of weeks ago I was reading the news and saw this weird picture: In case your eyes can't make sense of it, I'll give you a hint. It's not a puppy. I'm guessing it's not an air freshener, either. It is, in fact, a Burmese Python that ruptured and now has a really big dead Alligator sticking out of it's stomach. Oh, and something ate the snakes head off. That's why there is no head there. National Geographic has
11 comments
Read more

Oooohhh...I just LOVE when you wrap it around me... do it again, please?

I had heard that "crack" kills. I just never really believed it until I saw it with my own eyes. (Bless his heart.) About 3 years ago I was 6 months pregnant and had two daughters (aged 4 and 5). We were all traveling from Bellingham, WA to Atlanta, GA with a VERY brief layover in Dallas. We were booked on a major airline that should remain anonymous as they are a bunch of asshats (but they rhyme with "Mamerican Mairlines") and we had to leave for the airport at 3:30 AM in order to catch our 7AM flight. It was Suck City. By the time our car arrived in Seattle my husband and I were barely speaking to each other and the girls had marks on their faces and arms from the backseat smack-down they had while out of our reach. When I went to the counter to speak with the representative she informed me that even though our seats had been purchased many months ago and seat assignments had been given all of that had changed and we were no longer sitting together as a family. I
34 comments
Read more

Pervy McPervert strikes again!

When I was a kid I used to make the occasional prank call. But then I turned 13 and decided that it was a fairly retarded way to spend ones time. I've also received a few "heavy breathing" calls in my day. My mom finally bought us a whistle and said that whenever "he" called that we were to blow the whistle as loud as we could into the phone. That worked although I do wish she had specified that before blowing the whistle I should take the receiver away from my head as my ear made this weird ringing noise for days afterward. But it got rid of the pervert. It's a new day, however, and perverts must be looking for new ways to annoy us. Twice today someone has texted a picture to me. I have no idea who he is or what the hell he wants. But he must think that I don't know that sometimes shirtless men squeeze their arms against their chest to give the appearance that they actually have biceps when, in fact, their arms really look like toothpicks that are broke
23 comments
Read more