Almost every morning I have eggs for breakfast. I love them poached or over easy with a little butter. In fact my family eats so many eggs that I buy 3 dozen at a time. This is why I found it so surprising that, when given the opportunity, the idea of eating a Farm Fresh egg made me feel like I needed to barf. And here is why: Farm Fresh eggs don't come in a Styrofoam container. No indeed. Rather, they come out of the asshole of a chicken. Did you get that? The bird SHITS out its offspring. And then we crack open its' protective layer and fry it in some butter. Did I mention that they are warm to the touch and the shell is covered with a gooey afterbirth? Oh, yeah! And sometimes, if you get really lucky there can be feathers and hay and shit stuck to it in the goop. And then there is the yolk. It is noticeably more orange in color than its' store bought counterparts leaving you to wonder WHY. This past summer we vacationed on a lovely farm. Horses, chickens, roosters, aspar...
Like sex, but with a B.