Light a match!

You know, people are getting so touchy these days. I just read this news story about a THIRTEEN year old kid who got arrested.

When I saw the headline I thought, "Man, this country is going to hell in a hand basket. What did this criminal mastermind DO, anyway?? Did he steal a car? Get his moms attention by throwing a cleaver at her head? Sexually assault his little sibling??"

Noooo....

No, this kid farted in school. And then got arrested. Apparently I went to school with a bunch of felons and didn't even know it.

Besides, have you seen what they feed these kids in school lunchrooms?? And "The Man" is going to blame intestinal distress on HIM??!

Let's file this under "Give Me A Fucking Break, Please."

The teacher said that he was purposefully farting and therefore disrupting the class. Plus? This little fucker turned off a few computers that his friends were working on.

I think it would be far more incredible if you could find me a 13 year old who doesn't fart on command and then fall to his knees in laughter. In fact, invert the age and find me a 31 year old who isn't the same way. I double dog DARE you.