Drying the Twins


OK. My husband told me that yesterday's post sucked so I need to put something else up. Therefore I've been looking for something funny. And I'm looking everywhere.

Here is a possibility....

After my Pilates class this morning I went to the restroom where there was a young woman and her hairdryer. She was completely dressed and her hair was dry and pulled back in a pigtail. She did not appear wet (currently, recently or otherwise). The dryer was on, inside her shirt and she appeared to be drying her breasts. It made me wonder what the hell she had going on in there.

So I went into the stall, peed and figured that by the time I came out she'd be working on something else. But no. She still had the dryer on and in her shirt. She was chatting with various people and seemed to be genuinely unaware that what she was doing was odd.

As you may have surmised, I myself have breasts (no applause necessary). But I find that whenever the need to dry them arises that a quick wipe or two with a towel and we're there. Presto!! The twins are dry! I ran out of things to pretend to do in the locker room so I had to leave (or face the accusation of being a pervert/stalker like this guy) but by my estimation she had been blow drying her hooters for at least 5 minutes. Hrumph. I wish I'd asked her. There is no pool at this gym so it's not even like she was drying a bathing suit.

Well, damnit. I just re-read the above and, as you've probably already noticed, it isn't horribly funny. Just weird. Oh well. Maybe tomorrow someone will slip on a banana peel or something. Until then...

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Comments

the frogster said…
I know those two. The Nob Hill twins. We used to live near them in San Francisco and we saw them fairly often and they were ALWAYS dressed exactly alike.

I don't even want to get into what men do with those dryers.
Daniel said…
I found that funny in two ways.

That picture - I am always amazed that senior citizen twins are still dressing and accessorizing identically. Have they not one single individual preference?

The other is - that whole dryer thing in a WTF kind of way. I've used a dryer for private body parts in humid weather before I finish dressing - but geez Louise, not for 5+ minutes.
Kadi said…
Maybe they were fake boobs. From sheer personal experience, I know that fake boobs are always cold. The only time they warm up is in warm water (and apparently under a blow dryer.) Thanks for the tip, though! The next time my twins are a bit chilly...I'll visit my nearest public restroom :)
leigh said…
maybe she was suffering from under-boob sweat. as a large-breasted woman i find find this a common side effect from exercise.

p.s. my husband says hoisting cocktails doesn't count as exercise.
Bex said…
Frogster,

Hi! I chose (read: stole) their picture because of the interesting coif...that's cool that you know them. They look like a barrel of laughs!

Daniel,

I'm so glad that the last thought I have before eating dinner is of you drying your wedding tackle with a hair dryer. So thanks for that! As for the twins, I know, right? I wonder if they live together or something?? Frog?? Do you know?

Kadi,

Wow! Tonight is the big night, eh? In case others don't know, Kadi and her brood are going to be on Super Nanny tonight. As for your boobs, huh. I'd never heard that about the fake ones. Good to know, though. Break a leg tonight on the show!!!

Leigh,

Pffffttt...snicker...I hear you, man! Don't you just love the husbands??? Mine said, after reading all of the comments here, "Hmm. Did you notice that NOBODY argued with you about yesterdays post sucking?? Coincidence? I think not..." He's lucky that I'm too lazy to find a new husband!

And please let YOUR husband know that cocktails always count!

OK. I'm off to see if I can figure out when and where Super Nanny is on. Thanks for the comments, guys!
Bee said…
Bex, I disagree the story was funny! The way you tell it is what's amusing and the fact that you
A) Lingered
B) Lingered
C) Lingered
;o)
I'm a total Seinfeld dork so... Did you ever see the one where George has Kung Pao and then sweats throughout the day? Maybe she's a sweater.
Were her boobs big? I'm asking only for medical reasons.

No, I'm not a doctor.
xDashofPanachex said…
If that's what she does in public, what does she do at home? Walk around with a special space-heater strapped to her chest?
Jinksy said…
Maybe she killed someone with her breasts. And like Lady MacBeth trying to wash the shame out of her hands, she was trying to dry the love pillows in order to cleanse herself of her evildoings.

Or maybe she's just into weird stuff.
Bex said…
Bee! Yep, you got me...I'm a lingerer. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I'm not actually invisible and that people CAN and DO see me staring at them with my mouth ajar. Medically speaking, no. Her boobs weren't huge. A 'C' cup at the most.... Ummm...doesn't this automatically make me a pervert/stalker because I noticed her bra size???

And yes, Seinfeld was an EXCELLENT show. I miss it terribly.

X dash of Panachex,

Firstly, welcome. Secondly, what gives with your name? I followed your profile and there wasn't a blog listed. Thirdly, hahahahahaha!! Funny comment!!!

jinksy,

Like the cat in Meet the Parents? As for your cleansing theory ... hmmmm. Maybe. Or maybe she dropped a popcorn kernel into her sports bra and was trying to see what it would feel like if it popped? I guess that would fall under your second guess, that she's just into weird stuff.
Cara said…
It is too funny. In a total WTF sort of way. Plus how you were totally loitering trying to see what the hell she way up to. That is pure comedy right there.
Steph said…
Ok that was interesting

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