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I have something warm for the hairy fairy...

You know what I did tonight??

Let me break it on down for you:

The 3 lovely Russians who live (temporarily) in my basement went to bed about 2 hours ago. My husband went to bed an hour and half ago. And then half an hour later I stuffed a dollar bill into my own cleavage and then began surfing blogs. And that's where I still am at this moment. Surfing, dollar bill peeking out.

As for the blogs, I went on a sort of a stalking tour. I checked out the website of Just A Girl which is funny in and of itself. But that wasn't enough to satisfy me. NO! I needed more! So I went trolling around on her blogroll for shits and giggles. And that's exactly what I found! Nice job, JAG! You have some winners on the old roll! Thanks for sharing!!!

As for the dollar bill, my eight year old lost yet another tooth. I've already forgotten the tooth fairy thing twice this year and I'm afraid that she wouldn't fall again for the "Well, maybe the Tooth Fairy couldn't find your pillow cuz it's such a friggin dump in here. I'll bet if you clean your room up she'll bring you something tonight..." So, I figured if I put the dollar in my bra I'd remember the tooth fairy when the money falls out of my shirt when I get ready for bed.



As long as this guy doesn't come anywhere near my house tonight I think we'll be ok. It's not so much that I'm afraid of him. It's because my two year old boy has a toothbrush fetish and I don't think he'll be able to understand that "We don't know where that has been."

Comments

Anonymous said…
A toothbrush fetish...really?

And is there some Freudian connection to mother's cleavage filled with dollar bills?

really?

anyway - nice post. gave me some laughs
Alice said…
My boy saw something on TV where the kids got chocolate coins instead of money for losing a tooth. Do you know what this means in terms of losing a tooth? It means cruising the stores at 10 pm looking for chocolate coins that don't exist outside of Christmas.
Brad said…
My grandmother tried to push the candy thing on me, but wiseass that I was (am) I told her that "candy is how this happened in the first place. Please pay me."
Oh my gosh, I don't yet have to do the tooth fairy thing, but I would probably do the same thing! That is so funny!

I have got to keep checking out your blog. I've been so remiss.
Meg said…
Whenever I forget, I hide a bill in my hand and make a big fuss of looking under the pillow. Then what do you know, I find the bill inside of the pillow case and tell the kid he just needs to look more thoroughly.
Bex said…
David - Really. He actually bounces from toothbrushes (his, mine, strangers ... doesn't matter) and flushing toilets. I've actually tried "allowing" him to flush the toilet as an incentive to USE the toilet. It's not working.

Alice - Sounds like Hanukkah coins to me. My best friend growing up was Jewish and these were an instant favorite for me.

Brad - Well played, Sir! You get the money, then you can go buy your OWN candy. You know, the good stuff, like a snickers or something and not some abandoned Halloween peep that has hardened into a marshmallow of doom.

Jonny's Mommy - It's a whole another world out here in the land of Tooth Fairies. And then there is the land of training bras which apparently I've just entered. It's more like the land of "wishful thinking" to me, but whatever.

Meg - Yeah, I've done that once but almost busted by my extremely skeptical daughters. They ask me every stinking time if I'm the tooth fairy. I always say the same thing, "What does it matter? You got your money, right? Who cares who brought it...?"
Anonymous said…
that fairy scares me. i'm usually quite fond of fairies, like when i get my hair cut or want to sing karaoke at mary's in east atlanta.
Rickey said…
Agreed, when Rickey procreates, that fat bastard misanthrope aint getting near Rickey's kids. Rickey's getting bars installed on the windows. A perimeter will be established.
Stephanie M said…
We forgot to be the tooth fairy two nights in a row this year - ouch. Putting the money in your bra is a great idea/reminder.
And how, just exactly, does a toothbrush fetish manifest itself? Does he collect them off the street and lay them out in pretty rows on the bathroom counter?
Kirsten said…
LOL! Thanks for the laugh. I almost forgot the tooth fairy last week! The bra thing is a good tip. (pun intended)

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