Skip to main content

Bend Over and Grab Your Ankles, Kids. Your School Board Is "Affecting Change" Again

You know, it's almost funny. But sometimes the state of affairs in the Georgia education system is INSANE. We are ranked 49th out of the 50 states. My kids attend public schools here and I only have glowing compliments to the schools and teachers. But the SYSTEM. It's nuts. And, frankly, I blame the school boards of Metropolitan Atlanta.

Not long ago the Cobb County School Board was sued because they had (without seeking approval) placed stickers in biology books stating that the process of Evolution is not a fact. The Christian Right was, of course, at the heart of this issue, arguing that their views should be introduced somehow into our curriculum. WHATEVER, Jackasses. All I know is that this whole experience has made me consider that there might be an almighty power who is indeed called The Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Once the news of Cobb County hit the AP wires all hell broke loose. My relatives across the frigging GLOBE shot me emails asking, "WTF?!" What the fuck indeed.

And then, just today, something miraculous happened. Cobb County is no longer the designated asshole of the state. Woo hoo! Yep, that distinct honor goes to Clayton County as their school board lost the accreditation for their entire county. Nicely done! Wow...that hasn't happened to a county in our entire country since the late 1960's when there was civil unrest and shit. Now there are 50,000 kids with uncertain futures. Kids in their senior year are going to have to try to get into colleges without having graduated from an accredited high school. Good luck, you guys. You might want to look into the Barbizon School of Beauty. Or just skip it altogether, accept your fate (that you got FUCKED by your incompetent school board) and take a bullshit job that offers you what I'm sure will be a pathetic hourly wage.

In sum, I hope that The Flying Spaghetti Monster decides he's had enough of this, too, and eats the Clayton County School Board with a nice Pinot Noir. Or that he at least pelts them with old, rank meatballs. They've got something coming, that's for DAMN sure.

Well. I've just re-read today's post and will admit, it's officially a rant. Sorry about that. But I just cannot believe how incompetent these school boards are. Shame on us all for electing these asshats to such important positions. I hate politics like I hate bad shellfish but it's almost enough to make me want to run for office. But they'd probably want me to stop dropping the "F" bomb. And that is SO not happening.

Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck. There! I feel better already....

If you've read this far, then I'm amazed. And I'd feel awkward about asking you to click on my HB smiley because this just wasn't that funny. But I won't get mad if you do. ;)


Comments

Meg said…
I'm clicking for the fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck. ;)
Anonymous said…
Its any wonder that the whole education system hasn't imploded with all the corruption and the sex scandals.

Its as if George W and Bill Clinton decided to get into the school board system and run it like....

Well, okay, now I'm ranting.
Chat Blanc said…
asshat MUST be on the board member qualifications list. yeowza!
Kirsten said…
It is THAT funny. You get a smiley!
Thanks for venting.
Nice. Accreditation is overrated anyway. Um... right?
Bex said…
Thanks, Meg! My husband likes that, too. I mean when I SAY it, of course. Well...hopefully he likes the other thing...oh, never mind.

Jinksy - Rant away, buddy. You're exactly right. All we need is to get Gore and Cheney in there and we would have The Perfect Storm.

Chat Blanc - Yep! As I was reading the article there was some mention of one of the board members who doesn't even live in that county. Apparently he was picked up for a domestic abuse charge (how lovely!) and they went to the address listed on his drivers license and his relative (who DID live there) said that he lived in another county and has never, ever slept in that house. Total assHAT!

Kirsten - Thanks a ton!
shyloh's poetry said…
This is why I home schooled my daughter from age, oh let's say 1 through 17. She graduated and is very wise. And she just moved out of my home and moved to Alabama. Don't ask why Alabama... Ok we have very close friends there and she really likes it...But hoping she will continue school. I am just not smart enough to teach at a college level. I wish all the schools would get their act together. It is very important.
Bex said…
Jeff - Probably. The scary thing is that, in my humble opinion, our standards are SO low. How BAD must it have been to have their accreditation yanked? They must have just been eating paste all day or something.

Shyloh - Wow. Home schooled for 16+ years. That's cool. I'm just not built that way. The first time that yellow bus came by my house was one of the happiest days of my life. That having been said, I do stay involved in their studies (make sure they do their home work, read as much as possible every day, etc.). But I am firmly attached to my "ME" time. I'm an ass that way.

Alabama! Wellllll...I don't know what to say about that. I do hear that everyone is real nice down there....
Anonymous said…
School boards in general are fuckwits (although I have to give props to ours, because they admitted they effed up hiring a crook for a super & fired him 6 months later). Those poor kids! That's what kills me - they kids are the ones who end up suffering for this bureaucratic nonsense.
clayton county is the armpit of the atlanta suburbs, no doubt. glad i live in inner-city atlanta, where the schools are outstanding!

the good news is that clayton is a GREAT place to learn how to be a criminal (i once dated a prosecutor from clayton county)! why would anyone punch a timeclock when he can punch a pedestrian and take his watch?
Anonymous said…
OMG, You said Asshat!!! ROFL. I think I may need to go to beed soon, I am uber giggly.
Anonymous said…
My heart breaks for the kids that have been in the schools that got an education that has been manipulated into stupidity by religious zealots that care little for science.
Anonymous said…
Is asshole of the state an official award? Coooool!
Alice said…
Must go see what they did. How did I miss this story?!

Ramen.

Popular posts from this blog

Pervy McPervert strikes again!

When I was a kid I used to make the occasional prank call. But then I turned 13 and decided that it was a fairly retarded way to spend ones time. I've also received a few "heavy breathing" calls in my day. My mom finally bought us a whistle and said that whenever "he" called that we were to blow the whistle as loud as we could into the phone. That worked although I do wish she had specified that before blowing the whistle I should take the receiver away from my head as my ear made this weird ringing noise for days afterward. But it got rid of the pervert. It's a new day, however, and perverts must be looking for new ways to annoy us. Twice today someone has texted a picture to me. I have no idea who he is or what the hell he wants. But he must think that I don't know that sometimes shirtless men squeeze their arms against their chest to give the appearance that they actually have biceps when, in fact, their arms really look like toothpicks that are broke

And The Winner Is...

I have some very exciting news. For the first time ever the Blog of Bex is giving out an award . Yes, I know. I can feel my heart pounding, too. I will call it the Bite My Ass Award (BMAA) and I'm sure it will be coveted. Now you might be wondering just who will be the lucky recipient. Could it be Diesel, the mastermind of Humor-Blogs and Mattress Police , who - for reasons unknown to me - revamped the scoring system and and reset my score to zero? Nope. This action has actually mysteriously seemed to work in my favor. I'm sure it's temporary. ANYWAY, on to the big news. I hereby give my BMAA to this guy: Handsome little fucker, isn't he? His name is James Jackson, IV and his friends call him Jay. I like to call him Fucktard because I believe that your name should say something about the kind of guy you are. And he's a total fucktard. What, you may wonder, did he do to generate such ire from me? Well I'm so glad you asked. He owns two boutiques in suburban At

The Dunkin Donuts Dilemna

I am always amazed when I leave my home in the early hours of the morning and there are people out and about. I can barely see the runners (as the sun isn't yet passed the horizon) but they are hoofing it up the hill. Don't these people know that they should be home - in bed - snuggled up???! So you can imagine my surprise when, at 6AM, I saw the impressive line at my local Dunkin Donuts. But we were heading out of town on a road trip with 3 little kids (all under 8) and a 2 month old puppy. I know what you are thinking...WHY??! We very anxiously wanted to travel for a little bit of more pain - AKA my 20th High School reunion. Maybe more on that later... As if this all weren't bad enough, my husband and I had been to a party the night before and I had just the slightest headache. So I needed coffee and like all reasonable people I went to the Dunkin Donuts because their coffee is THE BEST coffee anywhere! Starbucks can kiss my lilly white! But I digress... So I get in the l