Bend Over and Grab Your Ankles, Kids. Your School Board Is "Affecting Change" Again

You know, it's almost funny. But sometimes the state of affairs in the Georgia education system is INSANE. We are ranked 49th out of the 50 states. My kids attend public schools here and I only have glowing compliments to the schools and teachers. But the SYSTEM. It's nuts. And, frankly, I blame the school boards of Metropolitan Atlanta.

Not long ago the Cobb County School Board was sued because they had (without seeking approval) placed stickers in biology books stating that the process of Evolution is not a fact. The Christian Right was, of course, at the heart of this issue, arguing that their views should be introduced somehow into our curriculum. WHATEVER, Jackasses. All I know is that this whole experience has made me consider that there might be an almighty power who is indeed called The Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Once the news of Cobb County hit the AP wires all hell broke loose. My relatives across the frigging GLOBE shot me emails asking, "WTF?!" What the fuck indeed.

And then, just today, something miraculous happened. Cobb County is no longer the designated asshole of the state. Woo hoo! Yep, that distinct honor goes to Clayton County as their school board lost the accreditation for their entire county. Nicely done! Wow...that hasn't happened to a county in our entire country since the late 1960's when there was civil unrest and shit. Now there are 50,000 kids with uncertain futures. Kids in their senior year are going to have to try to get into colleges without having graduated from an accredited high school. Good luck, you guys. You might want to look into the Barbizon School of Beauty. Or just skip it altogether, accept your fate (that you got FUCKED by your incompetent school board) and take a bullshit job that offers you what I'm sure will be a pathetic hourly wage.

In sum, I hope that The Flying Spaghetti Monster decides he's had enough of this, too, and eats the Clayton County School Board with a nice Pinot Noir. Or that he at least pelts them with old, rank meatballs. They've got something coming, that's for DAMN sure.

Well. I've just re-read today's post and will admit, it's officially a rant. Sorry about that. But I just cannot believe how incompetent these school boards are. Shame on us all for electing these asshats to such important positions. I hate politics like I hate bad shellfish but it's almost enough to make me want to run for office. But they'd probably want me to stop dropping the "F" bomb. And that is SO not happening.

Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck. There! I feel better already....

If you've read this far, then I'm amazed. And I'd feel awkward about asking you to click on my HB smiley because this just wasn't that funny. But I won't get mad if you do. ;)


Comments

Meg said…
I'm clicking for the fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck. ;)
Jinksy said…
Its any wonder that the whole education system hasn't imploded with all the corruption and the sex scandals.

Its as if George W and Bill Clinton decided to get into the school board system and run it like....

Well, okay, now I'm ranting.
Chat Blanc said…
asshat MUST be on the board member qualifications list. yeowza!
Kirsten said…
It is THAT funny. You get a smiley!
Thanks for venting.
Jeff said…
Nice. Accreditation is overrated anyway. Um... right?
Bex said…
Thanks, Meg! My husband likes that, too. I mean when I SAY it, of course. Well...hopefully he likes the other thing...oh, never mind.

Jinksy - Rant away, buddy. You're exactly right. All we need is to get Gore and Cheney in there and we would have The Perfect Storm.

Chat Blanc - Yep! As I was reading the article there was some mention of one of the board members who doesn't even live in that county. Apparently he was picked up for a domestic abuse charge (how lovely!) and they went to the address listed on his drivers license and his relative (who DID live there) said that he lived in another county and has never, ever slept in that house. Total assHAT!

Kirsten - Thanks a ton!
shyloh said…
This is why I home schooled my daughter from age, oh let's say 1 through 17. She graduated and is very wise. And she just moved out of my home and moved to Alabama. Don't ask why Alabama... Ok we have very close friends there and she really likes it...But hoping she will continue school. I am just not smart enough to teach at a college level. I wish all the schools would get their act together. It is very important.
Bex said…
Jeff - Probably. The scary thing is that, in my humble opinion, our standards are SO low. How BAD must it have been to have their accreditation yanked? They must have just been eating paste all day or something.

Shyloh - Wow. Home schooled for 16+ years. That's cool. I'm just not built that way. The first time that yellow bus came by my house was one of the happiest days of my life. That having been said, I do stay involved in their studies (make sure they do their home work, read as much as possible every day, etc.). But I am firmly attached to my "ME" time. I'm an ass that way.

Alabama! Wellllll...I don't know what to say about that. I do hear that everyone is real nice down there....
kc said…
School boards in general are fuckwits (although I have to give props to ours, because they admitted they effed up hiring a crook for a super & fired him 6 months later). Those poor kids! That's what kills me - they kids are the ones who end up suffering for this bureaucratic nonsense.
muskrat said…
clayton county is the armpit of the atlanta suburbs, no doubt. glad i live in inner-city atlanta, where the schools are outstanding!

the good news is that clayton is a GREAT place to learn how to be a criminal (i once dated a prosecutor from clayton county)! why would anyone punch a timeclock when he can punch a pedestrian and take his watch?
kaitizik said…
OMG, You said Asshat!!! ROFL. I think I may need to go to beed soon, I am uber giggly.
David said…
My heart breaks for the kids that have been in the schools that got an education that has been manipulated into stupidity by religious zealots that care little for science.
Chris Wood said…
Is asshole of the state an official award? Coooool!
Alice said…
Must go see what they did. How did I miss this story?!

Ramen.

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