American Sports Bra, Saves the Day!!!

You know what takes balls? Being a 24 year old American woman who gets a wild hair and decides to go hiking in the Bavarian Alps all by herself.

What's that you say? You are having trouble picturing the Alps?? Well, take a gander.

Pretty fucking big, eh? I don't even like to walk around my block by myself after dark. I cannot imagine thinking that this hike would be a good idea. I don't even see a spa anywhere. WTF was she thinking?!

Anyway, you know what sucks? Being the aforementioned chick who fell off of a small cliff in the Bavarian Alps and was trapped on the ledge with her injuries from the fall for a few days with no way down other than a fall that would surely cause her death.

And you know what takes brains? Using her sports bra as a method of attracting attention to get rescued.

Some guy was walking around in the Alps, probably yodeling or something, when suddenly he sees a sports bra dangling from a rope. "Hmmmm...." he thinks to himself. "There is probably some hot fraulein up there just waiting to take a bite of my apple! She is probably a very enlightened lassy who has a thing for beer bellys and knows that there ain't no party like a yodelers party. I think I'll scurry up this treacherous mountain and check her out!" And he runs off singing, "Yodelay ee heee...."

And when he gets there he finds some banged up American in need of airlifting to a hospital. Bummer. But, she's healing up and survived something that would have killed me about 45 seconds after it happened. Right after I realized that there wasn't a flushing toilet within my reach.

So let's give a big old Bavarian toast to Lorenz Rasp for having balls and brains (a rare combination these days). You go, girl!

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Jacki said…
Heck, I have flown over the Alps and that is about as adventurous as I want to get.
Sue said…
Holy mother!!!!! Represent, bitch!

p.s. beware: you will get a lot of "bra-surfing" visitors for this post.
Diesel said…
Balls I'll grant you, but her brains seem to be intermittent.
Diesel said…
And I resent that "bra-surfing" comment.
Ummm...Google said I would be able to find some information about bra-surfing here, but this doesn't seem to be what I'm looking for.

Tee Hee! Just kidding! Great post, by the way!
I don't even walk downstairs in the morning without a half-assed plan, and if I fell down them, I'd be screwed! When I read about this woman, I gave her points for the bra thing, then subtracted most of them for the whole Alps thing.
Meg said…
I'm surprised that the guys were intrigued by a sports bra--they're not the sexist of things, you know.
Alice said…
The guy would have taken one look at my bra with all the elastic shooting out of it from a zillion washes and left me on the ledge.
damon said…
Suuuuure, but nobody likes to talk about the GUY stranded on the other side of the mountain, naked and waving his jockstrap.
Bex said…
Jacki - me too. Unless the words "spa" or "resort" are in the title.

Sue - YO! (And yes, my bra-surfing visitors went through the roof. Perverts. OH. Hi, Diesel. I didn't see you standing there.)

Diesel - Touche.

Fold my laundry - I've always suspected...

For a different kind of girl - when you're right, you're right.

Meg - Hey, speak for yourself! My sports bras are HOT. (If you're into fading, exposed elastic bras that seem to scream "We can't hold it much longer, Captain! We're giving it all we've got but she's gonna BLOW!")

Alice - I feel ya, sista. But as long as I don't knock anyone (myself included) out during aerobics I call it a Good Day.

Damon - bwahahaha! Knowing men he'd probably try sling-shotting it. Jock strap. You're funny, homey.

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