You funny, funny little tax man!

Those IRS guys are just SO funny. Truly hilarious. Stop it...my sides are killing me.... At least I assume that they are joking. I mean, they MUST be joking. They don't really think that after SUFFERING for hours to fill out their ridiculously complicated forms that I'm just dying to give my three dollars to the friggin' Presidential Election Campaign. Right?? RIGHT??!

And am I crazy or would they use this money to do what I DEPLORE, which is run back-to-back advertisements when I'm trying to watch TV and then have recorded messages call my house when I'm doing something really important (like writing this blog)?

Does anybody give money to this? It must be the IRS' extremely feeble attempt at cracking a joke to ease me into the realization that I just paid a shit load of money for my kids to go to the World Famous Georgia Public School System where the motto is, "We're 49th! We're not the worst in the country! Yee haw, ya'll!"

So here is a list of things that I will do BEFORE I ever consider give up my three bucks:

* Purposefully slam my hand in the car door.
* Bite off at least one inch of my tongue.
* Have unprotected sex with a Haitian prostitute.
* Run for President (after the prostitute - obviously).

I hope this clears things up.

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Comments

kcar said…

So true! I mean lord forbid they collect for anything worth while like feeding the hungry, cancer research, Aids prevention, school improvements (since my child will be educated in a trailer next year) or actually paying our educators what they are worth. I mean they are only teaching the future of our country. I mean isn't that what my tax money should be going toward anyway?

8:53 PM

Mom said…

I would never give the $3 bucks, how am I to know it goes to what they say? Plus I am so feedup with the Presidental race right now I could puke!!! Are these people really the best America has to offer ???

2:48 PM

Bex said…

Kcar - I agree. They stiff our educators and then want to give the fat cat politicians THREE FUCKING DOLLARS. Actually, since we file jointly they offered us the chance to give six. I'll get right on that (right after I blow a pig out of my ass).

Steph - I know. It's like a small clown car pulled up or something. Maybe you should run....

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