I have Vaseline underneath my right index finger nail. No amount of soap and water seems to vanquish it. Sshhhhh. Don't tell anyone, K? Because that could lead to awkward questions. But I'll tell you what - today, just for shits and giggles, let's skip the questions completely and just go to the answers. And, GO. Projectile vomiting. One massive pile in the doctor's waiting room. Once in the car. Twice at home. Yes, that IS a lot of puke for a two year old. Anal suppositories. TWICE. No I am not honoring my pledge to lay off of the cosmo's for a while and fuck you for bringing that up after the day I've had. Did this make you smile? Or were you just envious that you didn't get to spend the morning pinning down a pissed off and puking two year old long enough to further enrage him by shoving a suppository up his ass? (thought so) Either way, feel free to click my HB smiley below. And, as always, if you're shopping around for funny blogs this is the pl...
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